How do I talk to my children about the Iran war?

Why This Matters

Children absorb more than we think, even when we try to shield them:

• The WHO estimates at least 10% of people exposed to traumatic war-related content develop serious mental health problems (WHO/NIH)
• Children may show anxiety through hyperactivity, withdrawal, sleep problems, or physical complaints like stomach aches
• Teens in particular may consume news and social media content about the war without parental awareness (SheKnows)

Age-Appropriate Approaches

Young children (under 7):

• Keep explanations very simple: “Some countries are having a disagreement and it’s far away from us”
• Focus on their immediate safety: “You are safe. Our family is safe”
• Maintain routines — bedtime, meals, play time should stay as normal as possible
• Limit their exposure to news coverage, including TV left on in the background

School-age children (7-12):

• Answer their questions honestly but briefly — don’t over-explain
• Acknowledge their feelings: “It’s okay to feel worried about this”
• Help them understand geography — showing how far away the conflict is can be reassuring
• Encourage them to talk to you if they hear something at school that worries them

Teenagers (13+):

• Have more open conversations — they likely already know about the conflict from social media
• Discuss media literacy: how to identify reliable sources vs. misinformation
• Acknowledge their concerns about the draft, economy, and future without dismissing them
• Limit news consumption on especially stressful days (ABC News)

Signs Your Child May Need Extra Support

Watch for:

• Persistent sleep problems or nightmares
• Withdrawal from friends or activities they normally enjoy
• Excessive worry or repeated questions about safety
• Changes in appetite or physical complaints (headaches, stomach aches)
• Difficulty concentrating at school
• Aggressive behaviour or increased irritability

What Experts Recommend

1. Limit live news — recorded summaries are less distressing than live footage
2. Be honest but reassuring — children can tell when adults are lying, which increases anxiety
3. Model calm behaviour — your children take emotional cues from you
4. Create space for questions — let them come to you rather than forcing conversations
5. Take action together — helping with a community project or donation can reduce feelings of helplessness
6. Seek professional help if anxiety persists beyond a few weeks

Sources: Good Morning America/ABC News, SheKnows, WHO/NIH